What???

You might ask what all my previous posts have to do with the title of this blog. You never realize how truly alone you are until you need someone else's help. I thought being on my own would be a breeze. I'm pretty independent and self-sufficient so living by myself would be a snap. Then you realize the house needs work, you need a gas tank installed for heat, you need heaters installed for heat because you gave away the heaters that were in the house when you moved in because you weren't thinking clearly and a whole host of other things. I think this is what they call when realization sets in. I don't know if it's easier for men to be alone than it is women but at some point for both of them, realization does set in.

I've always despised having to ask anyone for help. I never mind giving other people help but I don't like to be on the receiving end. I believe it's a pride thing. My Daddy was like that. He would help anyone, anytime but never wanted help for himself. Being divorced is somewhat of a humbling experience. I've been humbled because I've had to ask for and accept help from friends and family. But I've learned something too. In the past when I've helped other people and they have thanked me, I would always tell them it was no big deal. I was happy to do it. And they would always try to express to me what it meant to them. I don't think I really ever understood what it meant to the one recieving the help until now.

What do people do who don't have a big brother or big sister and brother-in-law to help them out? What do people do who don't have a church family to help them out? What do people do who like to consider themselves loners without friends to help them out? This is such a strange place I'm at in my life right now. I'm used to being the one who takes care of everybody else and now I'm the one being taken care of. As I said, it's a humbling experience. No one can go through life without help from someone at some point. We all need somebody, whether we like to admit it or not. Even if you just write a little blog about your life or eperiences, you need someone to read it. So, to all those people I need - my children, my siblings, my church family, my friends, all the people I love - I want to tell you how much I love you and appreciate everything you've already done for me. And I'm always here if you ever need any help.